I’ve never really been known for my ability to blend.
Maybe I should just blame it on my genetics and the fact I easily stood a good foot above most of my classmates for the majority of my childhood years. After all, when your “person” is composed predominantly of legs and your haircut isn’t exactly subtle, well, you’re kind of asking for it. I guess I should also mention I’m a middle child and I definitely grew up with that “middle child syndrome.” What does that mean? Well, I was plenty loud (read: obnoxious), basically all the time, to ensure I wasn’t forgotten about. And I sure wasn’t.
Yet, funny story; looking back, I could and did “blend” on occasion. I guess it was more of a when-it-suited-me kind of situation. Those days in class where you really didn’t want to be called on so you sat in the middle of the classroom, avoiding the extremes of front or back in order to best meld with the crowd. Or how about those times you’re at the grocery store to pick up those pseudo embarrassing personal hygiene products or some new underwear (even though everyone uses them) and you slowly meander to the aisle, keeping a casual pace so as not to draw attention to yourself. Or when you’re waiting for your delicious warm beverage to be made at Starbucks, you take a step back in order to 1) be out of the way and 2) to observe your surroundings as a non-participant.
It can be nice to blend.
Comically, I mentioned being 6 feet tall was one of the reasons I didn’t typically blend as a kid/high schooler/undergraduate student. Let me tell ya, cutting it down to 4.5 feet sure doesn’t help either — somebody add a point to my “extremes are bad for blending” theory. Naturally, I don’t think my struggles blending now are strictly due to that foot and a half height difference. Even though there’s a pretty high prevalence of Americans who self-identify as being disabled, you don’t see very many wheelers (especially young ones) rollin around the city of Chicago. So I get it, I don’t really blend. I think the hard part of that comes from my more recent realization that I really can NEVER blend.
Yea, I know it’s a bit sad that it’s taken me 4+ years to truly recognize that no matter how much I want to look like or be like everyone else, I never will.
“But Sam, why would you want to be like everyone else?! Differences and being unique is what makes the world diverse and awesome!”
True. But the ability to blend in is an ability that should be more appreciated than it is.
Or at least that’s what I thought since starting med school until last week. Continue reading