In case you aren’t super into current pop culture, I’m gonna start us off with a bit of a lesson in said topic.
There’s this thing called a hashtag that looks something like this, #. Yep, that’s a hashtag. It looks an awful lot like a number sign and that would be because it IS a number sign, but now I guess it’s also a hashtag. So hashtags are used as a way to basically group similar posts or topics in social media, like #gopackgo would be posts/pictures about the awesomeness of the Packers. Sometimes these crazy trends start and everyone will use a particular hashtag on a particular day of the week. For example #mcm is “man crush Monday” and people post pictures of their “man crush.” Don’t worry, I don’t use that hashtag because I would just post a picture of Oscar (our dog). And well, to put it in a non-offensive way, he isn’t technically a man (and I’m not talking about the fact he has four legs….) One of the other big hashtags is #tbt which is “throwback Thursday” and everyone posts pictures of them being cute and tiny or when they were in the womb (well, that second one might be a stretch). Here, I’ll give you a #tbt example…
Awe, look how cute everyone is…and how distracted I am. Unsurprisingly, that picture is a pretty accurate representation of our childhood…but I digress.
Yesterday, being Thursday, I did a #tbt on steroids meaning I lived my “throwback.” Yea, I may take the phrase “go big or go home” to the extreme.
I’m pretty sure everyone has a story about the day they took their drivers test. And for some people, a story about the days that they took their drivers test. I had a story for when I was 16 (or maybe I was actually 17-late bloomer:D) but I totally passed on the first try and was ridiculously stoked that I was done with that stupid test forever. Well, God has a sense of humor, because I just took my drivers test again yesterday with my hand controls.
Now you may be a bit confused. First, don’t worry, I was driving completely legal before I took the test–I even called down to Madison to ask. Taking the test to have hand control restrictions on your license is one of those, uh, highly recommended things that isn’t quite a law yet, but likely to become one in the future in Wisconsin. Second, you probably had no idea I was going to take my test yesterday, regardless of your connection to me. Truthfully, my older sister didn’t even know. It was a “mum’s the word” kind of activity.
So…why? Why didn’t I want to tell anyone?
You know, I’ve been thinking about that quite a bit…I mean, it is just a test. Just a system of points to determine if you’re a safe or unsafe driver. A system that determines if you pass or if you fail.
Or if you fail.
Fail. Yea, that would probably be the reason. I guess you could say I have a paralyzing fear of failure (ha, see what I did there? Yea, never mind, bad joke…)
It’s one of those things I haven’t stopped to think about before, and maybe you haven’t either. I mean, how do you handle failure? What does failure mean in your life? What impact does failure have on your future? Does failure even have an impact?
That’s a lot of questions and I don’t have a lot of answers, or any answers for that matter. I mean, sure, I’ve “failed” at things in my life–biffed it to the floor during a transfer, not getting a job or position I applied for, but when I do a quick glance back, I’ve been ridiculously blessed. God’s allowed me to work hard and be motivated and has helped me to achieve many many things in my life already.
I think I’ve made mention of it before that I’m in the rather long process of applying to medical school. I’m still waiting to hear back from four schools, but if I’m being completely and totally 100% honest with myself, I really don’t feel like acceptance is in the cards for me this cycle. My application is a bit, well, strange compared to the average applicant. Yes, I know being different does have benefits, but it has some disadvantages when you don’t have the experiences most admissions committees are looking for.
I can’t even begin to explain how much that possible rejection bothered me and the even bigger deal of admitting that I really did fail at something. Clearly, since I’m posting this on the inter-web for goodness knows how many people to read, something changed.
A good friend of mine made the comment the other day over a delicious cup of coffee that experience is life’s greatest teacher.
How true is that. God gives us these wonderful and sometimes crazy life experiences to learn from. Regarding my “unofficial” failure in the 2015 med school application cycle, I’ve learned just how much I want to become a physician (so yea, I plan on reapplying after beefing up the experiences on my application:D)
You know, I don’t think failures travel alone. I feel like they’re almost always accompanied by some really great blessings. Sure I didn’t (unofficially) get into medical school, but it opens up some doors I otherwise might roll past. Doors that allow me to spend more time with my family and crazy mother dearest (Costco runs included). Doors that encourage me to spend more time learning about my amazing God. Doors that let me meet and chat with some really entertaining teenagers who are involved with a local group I help out with. Those are some pretty sweet doors, and those are only the ones I know about…
You know, I don’t think I ever said how my epic life #tbt (aka my drivers test) actually went….
Experience really is life’s greatest teacher:D